youre lurking in front of me
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
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