Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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