My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
