Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize