the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
