Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
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