you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
