I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
When are your genitals available?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
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