dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
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