So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
