: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
