I wish I could teleport
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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