I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
