I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
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