you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
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