We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
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