Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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