she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
