idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
