I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
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