If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Pants 0. Shit 1.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
