i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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