Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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