check it out our google latitudes are spooning
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Randomize