I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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