Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
