In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
