maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
