This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize