walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
