I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
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