My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
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