what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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