You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
