it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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