I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Your cock deserves a montage
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
