i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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