Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
