You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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