I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
