but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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