I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
