Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize