i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Randomize
