that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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