Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
