that's an acceptable place to lick
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
