David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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