hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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