I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Life is so much better after having sex.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I am one with the molecules
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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