if only i could text you this smell
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Acid is not a monday night drug
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
